I should be a contender for most likely to have no idea if someone is interested in me. Unless it is blatantly or painfully obvious, if the person actually 'uses their words' to let me know that they think I'm pretty cute (or something along those lines), or if the person makes a 'bold move,' then the light bulb will probably go on.
In most gentleman's defense: my disposition, constant smile, and perky-ness could somehow send them mixed signals--that is until they realize that is how I am with everyone.
This guy couldn't use that defense though because prior to meeting him we had one conversation. To set the scene I was walking into a building on campus, he was walking out. He held the door open--I made eye contact, smiled and said "Thanks--have a good day" and walked into the building. That was the extent of our conversation, which didn't even register until I got a random facebook message.
The cliff notes version: Hi Emily--allow me to introduce myself. My name is ______ and I met you the other day when I held the door open for you...since then I've seen you on campus and I think you've smiled at me every single time. I know this is super lame using facebook but I couldn't find you on email, I didn't want to get your phone number from someone and randomly call you, etc. I was hoping I could take you on an official date (insert times and places), please let me know which would work for you...I'm looking forward to taking you out--but I'm sure I'll see you on campus before, like maybe even today. Keep smiling.
(as a disclaimer, I have a lot of respect for people who make a bold move and ask someone out--I know it is something that is extremely difficult to do, and I admire the courage and confidence it takes).
I took about 3 days to respond to this message because I was creeped out that he not only saw me a lot on campus, but also found out who I was, found me on facebook, etc. But my response mainly thanked him, while letting him know that I was extremely busy between school, volunteering, church, washing my hair...ya know, just the ususal reasons--so I couldn't go out with him. I didn't hear from him, so I assumed the matter was all squared away.
A week later I was studying outdoors on the opposite side of campus--enjoying the peacefulness, the sunshine, and the fact that it was probably one of the last beautiful days of the season. I had a baseball cap and sunglasses on, my backpack next to me on the bench, and my iPod in...if that doesn't say 'don't talk to me,' I don't know what does.
In the middle of my reading, someone came up and stood directly in front of me--waiting for me to look up...when I did, it was Mr. Wrong. I took out one ear bud and looked at him inquisitively--he smiled, taking that as an invitation to move my backpack and sit next to me, then look deeply into my eyes and tell me: I need to talk to you, and without waiting for a response went right ahead.
He, got my response and was so impressed with my extracurriculars: Could he volunteer with me? How about a study date at the library? Or maybe a study break--you have to eat, right? Even better though there were so many qualities about me that he loved (yes he used the l-word), and the were the exact qualities he was looking for in a wife. (by now I'm texting my mom to call me while pretending to listen and slowly starting to pack up my books). But more importantly than the qualities was the person I reminded him of...Jesus Christ. Miraculously the phone rang at that time, and I was able to extract myself from that painful situation.
I think he eventually figured that I wasn't quite into him when I didn't respond to his next 4 facebook messages or friend requests. I'm sure that somehow took me down a peg in his book--which was quite alright with me.
Still Waiting for my Mr. Right.