Monday, January 31, 2011

Mr. Wrong...Issue #5

I was taken aback when friends would email/text/ask me "Em, why don't you tell the story about ________, or the time you went on a date and ____________, or about the guy who _________..." Unfortunately for this particular guy--his name and persona came up quite often--so ladies and gentlemen--here's Jett*.


The second time Jett and I went out, he wanted to cook for me. Considering my lack of culinary aspirations at the time this was a fantastic development.  Jett and I ran to the grocery store at the last minute because he didn't realize he didn't have a certain spice.  While we were at Whole Foods his mom called. He picked up, chatted for a bit, and then handed me the phone saying: "She wants to talk to you...I've told her ALL about you."

Considering this was the 2nd time we hung out,--I wasn't sure what all he could have told her.  After a painfully awkward chat filled with small talk, pleasantries, and her repeated assurance that she had heard all about me--Jett took the phone back, and we had a wonderful (and delicious) rest of the evening.

A few dates later Jett and I were watching The Last Samurai when his mom called. He talked to her for a good 20 minutes--and asked if I wanted to talk to her--I didn't. When they hung up he looked me in the eye and said: "Baby, I hope one day you'll fall in love with me, and love me as much as my mom does." I burst out laughing, which was clearly not response Jett was hoping for.

Jett and I didn't last too long after that.  His constant questions about his mother: "Baby, she makes the best sweet potato pie--Will you ever do that?" My response of laughter coupled with "Absolutely Not" again was the wrong one. His constant conversations with his mother--talking at least twice a day for 20minutes to an hour a time and of course repeatedly texting her--became quite the scheduling conflict for us.  And of course his constant deference to his mother: "My mom thinks that we should go to mass together (his mom lived in a completely different state)...My mom thinks ladies always wear heels (I made a point to wear flip flops from then on)...I'm just the apple of my mom's eye."

This reinforced that I want someone who, like me, is an independent person--but also has a healthy and NORMAL relationship with their parents. Have you ever dated a mama's boy/girl? How did that work out?!

(*Name, as always, has been changed).

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