Friday, December 10, 2010

You are Special To Me

When I was little my mom would read the "I'll Love You Forever" book to my older brother, and then to me--but it was always her and David's book. A few (5 or 6) years ago, I found it at the bookworm, and bought it with the intention of giving it to my Dad as a Father's day gift... He then re gifted it to me during a time in my life where I really needed the general principle from the book  ("I'll Love You For Ever, I'll Love You For Always, As Long As I'm Living, My _______ You'll Be.") reiterated in my life. Since then, we've 'gifted' it back and forth when one of us seems to need it--in person, by USPS, or even hiding it with the knowledge that the other person will find it.

Last night, I had a discussion with my Dad about my deepest fear lately. Not failure, not finals, but a what-if that keeps repeating in my mind.  To preface, so many people have expressed their faith in my abilities whether they be scholastic, personal, athletic, social, etc. As loved as I feel because of that, I have this underlying fear: "What if they find out that I'm not as Special as they think?" Silly, huh? Yet, that is a thought that I can't get out of my mind--"What happens when they realize I'm just me...."

Instead of reiterating those sentiments. He acknowledged my fear, but went further by telling me that I am special--and a law school exam, or rank, a boy, a scale, a friend, etc. is not a way to define my special-ness. He reminded me that I am loved (forever) by him, and my mom--and loved by so many others.  And maybe that's what makes me special--the fact that I am loved--the fact that love overlooks the flaws--the fact that love overlooks the imperfections--the fact that love makes the giver and the receiver more beautiful.

So to my friends and family out there--thank you for making me special by loving me. I hope I can do the same, and do the same for you.

**AND THANK YOU FOR PUTTING UP WITH ME DURING MY FIRST SEMESTER OF LAW SCHOOL**

3 comments:

  1. I love this :) Good luck Em, you really are going to do amazing. I love this post.

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  2. Don't worry I'm using my hands to show regular people (way down low) and "just you" (way up high!).

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  3. I adore this post, Em :) I know finals make everything in life so much more difficult... And law school is NOT an easy thing to do. It's good that you recognize that no matter what you do or where you go, the people that MATTER will love you the whole way.

    You'll do great things, love!! I believe in you!!

    Xoxo always, B.

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